Supporting Children with Separation Anxiety 

Separation anxiety is a common but challenging experience for both children and parents. It manifests as intense worry when separated from loved ones or familiar environments, and its impact can be profound, especially during transitions like the back-to-school period. As a parent, understanding the causes, recognizing the symptoms, and knowing how to support your child are crucial steps in helping them navigate this emotional challenge. 

Causes and Risk Factors 

Separation anxiety causes an individual to suffer from feelings of extreme worry when apart from loved ones or places they are attached to. Separation anxiety doesn’t have one specific cause. Generally, it develops from a combination of a variety of factors such as genetics, personality, and early life experiences. Some examples of possible risk factors can include negative experiences in a school setting, high levels of stress, chemical imbalances, and social demands. It’s important to remember that each child is unique, and their experience with separation anxiety may vary based on these factors. 

Recognizing Symptoms 

Children with separation anxiety may exhibit a range of symptoms that can affect their daily life: 

• difficulty being away from loved ones 

• persistent and unrealistic worry about harm to loved ones or oneself upon separation 

• frequent difficulty leaving the house or going to school  

• difficulty sleeping and recurrent nightmares with the theme of separation 

• feeling physical symptoms when away from loved ones such as headaches, stomachaches, or nausea  

In the days leading up to school parents should be watching out for expression of fear, increased anxiety surrounding school, worries about safety, physical complaints (headaches, stomachaches), panic, temper tantrums, crying, or lashing out at times of separation. 

Separation anxiety can present differently depending on your child’s age. Young children often worry about harm coming to their parents or themselves and may refuse to go to school. Adolescents are more likely to experience physical symptoms like headaches or nausea along with school refusal. 

In the lead-up to events like going back to school, parents should be vigilant for signs such as increased anxiety, physical complaints, tantrums, or resistance to separation. 

Preparing for Back-to-School Separation 

The transition back to school can be particularly stressful for children with separation anxiety. Here are some strategies to help ease this transition: 

• Set Expectations: Prepare your child for what to expect on the first day of school. Make it a special day to look forward to. 

• Practice Separation: Start with brief separations in the weeks leading up to school to help your child adjust gradually. 

• Validate Emotions: Acknowledge your child’s feelings and reassure them that it’s okay to feel anxious. 

• Teach Coping Skills: Practice deep breathing, positive self-talk, and guided relaxation techniques together. 

• Maintain Routine: Stick to a consistent back-to-school routine, even if your child initially resists. 

Support Strategies for Parents 

As a parent, here’s how you can support your child through their separation anxiety: 

• Create a Safe Space: Encourage open communication where your child can express their fears without judgment. 

• Build Confidence: Recognize and celebrate your child’s efforts and achievements. 

• Seek Professional Help: If symptoms persist or worsen, consider consulting a healthcare provider for additional support and guidance. 

Separation anxiety is a challenging but manageable condition with understanding and support from parents. By being aware of the causes, recognizing symptoms, and employing proactive strategies, you can help your child navigate separation anxiety effectively, ensuring they feel supported and confident as they tackle new challenges like going back to school. 

Remember, every child is different, and with patience and empathy, you can make a significant difference in your child’s journey towards managing separation anxiety. 

If you or a family member needs behavioral and/or mental health treatment, but aren’t sure where to start, read more here or call 888-764-4161. We’re here to support! 

About the Expert 

Nicole Ferruggio is a Licensed Master Social Worker in New York. Nicole has experience working with and supporting children and adolescents diagnosed with anxiety, depression, autism, ADHD, and children who have experienced trauma. She utilizes a variety of treatment modalities which focus on meeting the individual where they are in order to best support them. In her work, she utilizes a strengths-based and collaborative approach to help empower individuals.